Showing posts with label Learning things. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Learning things. Show all posts

Tuesday, May 10, 2011

The Chickens: a true story

Warning: this story is a little bit gross

I was sitting up in my room when a commotion started downstairs. I had heard a car door slam shut in the driveway but had assumed it was my Dad getting back home from some errand he had slipped off to do, though I didn't remember hearing him leave the house. From the kitchen, the sound of the front door being opened was accompanied by exclamations in both English and Portuguese. The word galinha reached my ears several times letting me know that, somehow, there was a chicken involved in all this ruckus. "I don't wanna see it. I don't wanna see it. I don't wanna know." That was my brother's response to the entreaty from my Father: "Daniel! Come see, boy!"
"Oh please. Not more road kill." I thought as I remembered the dead Red Tailed Hawk that Dad had found “Still fresh and warm!” on the side of the road and had brought home a few weeks before.
"But who finds a chicken on the side of the road? This isn't exactly farm country..."
Sister Margarida's voice carried down the hall and up the stairs along with the other sounds (correcting my assumption that it had been my Dad closing a car door) but the words were lost in the noise and I couldn't understand what she was saying; I only knew it was Portuguese.
Gradually the excitement downstairs subsided and by piecing together the snippets of conversation that I had been able to understand, I deduced that Sister Margarida had brought a chicken and that it was dead, or would be soon.
I heard no squawking so I ruled out the possibility of a live chicken and felt it was safe to go downstairs and see the unfortunate fowl. I saved lesson 91 of "Keyboarding and Document Processing" on my laptop, gathered my phone along with the afore mentioned computer and went down the stairs.
There was Sister Margarida at the sink, my mother at her side. I put my things down on the table and said hello before I approached the sink. I was greeted at the counter by the sight of two spindly bird legs sticking straight up into the air.
"Oh look. A chicken."
There was indeed a chicken lying in our kitchen sink; two, in fact. Both were stripped bare of all feathers, one still featuring legs and a head while the other was lacking in both areas. The gory neck of the latter bird hung dripping from the body, deprived of its capital. For an instant, I was inclined to feel repulsed at the sight, but I quickly thought better of it.
 "I'll see worse when I'm a physician's assistant."
I stood by silently, not needing to ask any questions about where these chicken had come from because it was being discussed enthusiastically by the adults, now in one language, now in another. I learned that the Sister and a friend had gone to a farm owned by someone they knew and had there caught these two chickens along with a few more of their companions. They had brought their spoil to the Sister's friend's home and there...well, suffice it to say that was the last garage those chickens ever saw.
All this Sister Margarida explained as she skillfully cut into the headless bird and disassembled its innards. I watched with interest as one organ after another was pulled out of the avian carcass, trying to identify as many as I could.
"What's that?" I asked once.
"That's the testicles." she replied without blinking.
"...Oh."
She continued to disembowel her victim placing everything edible in the large pink bowl sitting on the counter and all the inedible parts in a plastic shopping bag that was lying in the sink.
“ You killed them yourself?” I asked
“Uh huh.” She took a small step back from the counter and motioned with a bloody hand to her pant legs; I saw that they were spattered with blood. “I grew up on a farm baby. I’ve done it all.”
“How appetizing.”
Once all the organs had been removed the Sister proceeded to cut the meat from the outside of the chicken.
She sliced around the thighs and wings and I cringed at the crunching sound when she twisted them off.
“This is what everyone did before supermarkets. All girls knew how to kill and dress a chicken.” I felt quite inferior to the women of prior times.
Soon the first chicken was done and the second endured the same fate as his fellow fowl. As she made the first slice and reached her hand inside, the intestines of the second animal reminded me of the expression used in 2 Samuel: “...and his entrails poured out on the ground.” It was fascinating to watch. Gruesome, but fascinating.
In dissecting the second bird, a hen, there was a surprise. Sister Margarida pulled five eggs, all in different stages of development, out of the bird. The first one she found was large, and probably would have been laid very soon. It didn’t have a hard shell, only a translucent membrane to hold it together. The other eggs were decrementaly smaller and were round instead of oval. As each egg was pulled out we became more interested and excited.
“Hey c’mere and see! Quick!“ I shouted to my siblings (They had, up to now, had no interest in watching the dissection) then I asked Margarida, “Are those edible?”
“Oh, yes. Yes.” was the enthusiastic reply.
“Go get the small pot and we’ll boil them.” my mother said to me.
I went obediently to the cabinet in the pantry, all the while talking seriously with myself in my head.
“I think I want to learn how to kill and dress a chicken. Ew. Thats so gross. But people had to do this all the time way back when. I’m always daydreaming about ‘the good ol’ days’... At least for the sake of being able to say that I know how...I really should learn. What if there is a disaster one day and all the big-name chicken farmers go out of business, or if all the grocery stores close?... I’m gonna learn how.”
My mom put the exceedingly fresh eggs in the pot and we both went back to our posts from which we had been observing the dissection. I was perched on a stool on the Sister’s left, and my mother stood to her right. My father would come and go, watching for a while, commenting “You’re brave, sister!”, and then going about his business.
“Hey, next time you get some chickens...can I come? I want to learn how to do that” I gestured to her hands.
"Yeah, you want to come? I bring you; sure."
"Thanks" I smiled, wondering if I really wanted her to follow through on that offer.
The second chicken was soon all cut up and placed in the bowl along with the first one.
The waste from the two birds was disposed of, the counter and sink were cleaned and the bowl with the meat was covered and placed in the downstairs fridge. We thanked Sister Margarida for thinking of us and then she was gone.
After she left I reviewed the whole chicken ordeal in my mind, amused and slightly incredulous.
"That might have been the weirdest thing that’s ever happened in this house...besides the hawk of course...I better write this down."






Tuesday, April 12, 2011

Milestones: sewing on a zipper

I have a book called "Last-Minute Fabric Gifts" which has a lot of fun, quick projects in it, most of which I haven't gotten around to trying yet. A few weeks ago I finally made a little make-up/travel bag that I had been admiring in the book for a long time. I made this one as a birthday gift for a friend but I think I am going to make one for me too. I really love the style of it and the fact that it has a lot of room inside.


This project marks a milestone for me because it is the first time I have EVER sewn on a zipper. Until I made this little bag I had always begged my mom to sew all the zippers for anything I made. I really have no clue why I was so averse to putting on a zipper; maybe it was the zipper foot for the machine that freaked me out or maybe I was just being lazy. (I think I was just being lazy).





I'm glad that I have overcome my antipathy for zipper sewing, and I am proud of my little travel pouch. I think it came out pretty.  :)

Thursday, February 24, 2011

I am not Emily Post.

As the final exam for my Family/Consumer Sciences class I was required to plan and host a dinner party.
I know. Best. Exam. Ever.
I had to pick a theme and create a menu, centerpiece, invitations and decorations to go with the theme.
I searched the internet for different ideas and finally decided on a fairytale theme because  I thought it would be the easiest theme to do everyone likes fairytales.
The idea was that the different items on the menu would have something to do with different fairytales.

The menu was:
first course: salad
second course: cheese soup in a bread bowl
entree: pecan-crusted pork with pumpkin butter, green beans and cresents (Three Little Pigs, Cinderella, Jack and the Bean Stalk, Hansel and Gretel)
dessert: apple crisp with ice cream (Snow White)
drinks: water, sparkling apple cider and coffee

I also made rose shaped butter pats to throw some Beauty and the Beast into the mix. The soup was originally supposed to be served in bowls made from little pumpkins (which would have tied in with Cinderella), but pumpkins are remarkably hard to come by in February so I had to use bread bowls instead. The salad doesn't tie in with any fairytale. I just like salad.

The invitations for the party were typed on the computer, printed on cream cardstock and decorated with quilling. I also made place cards to match the invitations but all of the pictures of them are annoyingly bright or blurry so the glimpses of them in the backround of different pictures and my word for it will have to be enough proof that they existed and were pretty.
I probably spent about an hour on each invitation. The nine place cards took me a few hours but that might be because I was watching Christy while making them. "Oh, please. Anyone can tell that she is going to end up marrying Neil. Give it up, David."


For a centerpiece I made my own rendition of Cinderella's carriage. I was originally going to buy a pumpkin and just make some wheels for it but as I said before there were no pumpkins to be found. I ended up making mine out of some fabric we had in the house.




The salads were pretty simple. Just some mixed greens, cucumber slices, grape tomatoes, and shredded white cheddar as a garnish. Ranch and Italian dressing were served in my mom's gravy boats.
 
The salads sat pretty in the fridge, waiting for the guests to arrive.

The bread bowls were quite an adventure to make. I was originally going to buy some round bread and carve it out, but all the round bowl-sized bread must have run away with the pumpkins because my mother searched several different stores and couldn't find any. We ended up buying frozen french loaf dough from Phillsbury and I shaped my own bread bowls from the dough. I promise that they were round when I put them in the oven. They just got a little misshapen.
You are probably wondering why I didn't just use actual bowls like a normal person. The answer is simple. We have no bowls. Well, no bowls matching our china anyway. Besides, bread bowls are yummy.

Cheese soup in a bread bowl.

Pecan-crusted pork with pumpkin butter may sound a little strange, but it is very yummy. It is a new favorite at our house. It is also really fun to say.

Pecan-crusted pork with pumpkin butter, green beans, a cresent and rose shaped butter.
No pictures were taken of the apple crisp. I guess the photographers were too busy trying to eat it before the ice cream melted. It was very tasty.

Daniel and Priscila went through training to be waiters for the meal. They helped a lot with getting ready for the party and they did a pretty good job serving too.



I bought the lights in the backround at Goodwill for $2 a strand and I got the idea from this tutorial to make the egg carton flowers for the them. The flower lights gave a really nice fairy tale glow to the room.


After dinner we took pictures and played Spoons, Bananagrams and Catchphrase.

The table, before we all sat down.



Somehow it all came together and it turned out to be a very pleasant evening despite the fact that I was running around like a crazy woman all day trying to get everything ready. A graceful hostess I am not, but I hope that with some more practice I will get better at it.

Monday, January 31, 2011

There's a new plumber in town...

Guess who just installed a new faucet in the kitchen sink. Can you guess? Me! That's who!
Yes, this is a really big deal.
It is a really big deal because I just learned a new life skill and did something useful for my mother.
It took me a really long time to get it done; I'm sure my mom could have done it in less than half the time it took me, but hey, it was my first try.
I learned how to use a plumber's wrench and how to use thread tape and I did it all by myself!
I'm pretty proud of myself, in case you couldn't tell. I'm happy that I have learned how to do something useful and that someday when I am married and the faucet on my kitchen sink needs to be replaced I won't have to bother my husband about it. I can do it by myself! Although, if he volunteers...I'm not gonna say no.

And now I am going to go make a sandwich. All this plumbing made me hungry!